I give up, I GIVE UP!

I seriously give up on life. On finding a guy, and having fun, and being happy. That's it. I no longer care. What's the point. Hell it's not even in the stars. My Chinese new year horoscope even said that this year isn't a good year for relationships for me. WHY WOULD IT BE, IT'S NEVER A GOOD TIME! You know I was thinking of getting my belly pierced and maybe even another tattoo. I think I am going through some sort of quarter life crisis. This is how I am going to deal with my emptiness. Tattoos and piercings. Maybe I'm thinking it will get me more attention, that I will actually mean something to someone, to anyone. Be interesting. I dunno. Why do I even try. It gets me no where. NO WHERE. I HATE BEING ANGRY ABOUT SHIT LIKE THIS. IT SHOULDN'T MATTER THIS MUCH! Why do I care now? What's changed? I cannot wait to go to Edmonton and hang with you guys. That is seriously the only time I ever feel normal. As normal as I can be.